Corona beer branding nightmare. Our suggestion.

Corona beer branding

Great Moments in Naming History

This one started out when my colleague Greg sent me a link to an article titled “No, It’s Not the ‘Corona Beer Virus.’ Lawd.”

I replied “Damn they must be fuming…what marketing spin would you put on this??”

To which Greg responded:

[Exterior, daylight. A beach side bar. Ominous music.]

A group of visibly sick people, possibly zombies, wander up to the bar. 
The bartender serves them all Coronas. As they sip their beers, their health visibly improves, the music becomes upbeat, and dancing and cheerful conversation ensues. 

Voice over: “Corona Beer. We don’t say it’s a vaccine for the Corona virus, but it ain’t gonna hurt you, neither.”

I am trying to pitch that one to the folks at Corona, with the proviso that if it ever gets produced, neither of us will be hauled off to the Stan Freberg Memorial Re-Education Camp and Self-Criticism Center.

Meanwhile, here’s another one from Greg that our younger readers may not remember: this is actually not the first time we’ve gone through something like this!

In the 1960s and 1970s, women’s magazines and newspaper Sunday supplements usually had an ad for a particular brand of diet pill. To suggest it would aid in your quest to lose weight, it was named…Ayds.

For obvious reasons, this product did not survive the 1980s. Nonetheless, as far as we can tell, this was merely a result of the unfortunate homonym, and no one back then actually believed you could contract HIV from the diet pill. So why are so many people stopping drinking Corona??

Surveying the present state of American Idiocracy, one can only say…”Take me now, Lawd!”

PS Lets all help out by drinking as much Corona Extra beer as we can this month and not being stupid thinking there is any connection to Covid-19. Just say “Dos Corona cervezas, por favor” on your next trip to a Mexican restaurant.

(C) 2020 Brighter Naming
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Posted in Branding, Consumer Goods, Drinks, International Naming, Sustainable Brand Names, Trademarks

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